Before Writing

Writing changed my life.

My teenage years were incredibly difficult, both mentally and emotionally. I was placed in special needs programs until seventh grade, and throughout middle school, I was heavily bullied. Making friends felt nearly impossible, and I was often misunderstood. That isolation followed me into my social life — dating wasn’t even on the table. Things weren’t much better at home either. I often clashed with my parents, especially my father. There were times I wanted nothing to do with him. Still, I’ll admit I didn’t always make things easy myself. As a kid, you’re learning, stumbling, and making mistakes. I made plenty — no doubt about that.

By the time I got to college, I thought I was going to become a video game developer. But after just three semesters, I was on the verge of flunking out. I was working over 30 hours a week, barely surviving in my Computer Science classes, and struggling to adjust to the demands of college life. The stress consumed me. I fell into a deep depression, unsure of what direction to take next.

Then one night, on a late drive with a college friend — someone I wish I still talked to today — he looked over at me and said, with total sincerity, “You love talking about sports. Why not write about it?” It felt like one of those lightbulb moments you only see in movies. For the first time in a while, something clicked.

Turning Point in College

It started with writing short pieces in introductory journalism and reporting classes — mostly about football and the Patriots. But as I progressed from class to class, I began to look inward – mostly reflecting on my life at that time and how shaky my first few semester were. Then came my final year to year and a half at the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth, everything changed. I began turning the focus even more inward, writing about and reflecting on my entire life up to this point.

At first, it was lighthearted — fond memories of childhood, like the first time I watched Tom Brady play or the first wrestling show my parents ever took me to. But soon, it evolved into something deeper. I started writing about the painful moments: middle school, high school, family conflict, self-image issues. I confronted my struggles with mental health, anxiety, and depression. I wrote about how I saw the world — and how I saw myself.

Writing opened a door I had long closed and forgotten how to reopen. It gave me space to reflect on everything I’d been through, the choices I made, and the person I’d become. And through that process, I learned more about myself than I ever thought possible. And I could say what that was, but honestly, I’m still learning. And that’s okay.

Writing as Therapy

What began as a creative outlet quickly became a form of therapy. Writing gave me something I didn’t even know I needed: a voice. Not just to talk about sports or hobbies, but to confront the parts of my life I never really understood until I wrote them down. There’s something powerful about putting pain into words — it turns chaos into clarity.

When I wrote about the moments I used to hide from, I didn’t just process them — I reclaimed them. I made sense of them. It was no longer just trauma or regret living in my head. It became a story. And when it becomes a story, you can learn from it. You can grow from it.

Why Writing Matters

Writing matters because it helps us understand ourselves. It slows the world down just long enough for us to catch up with our own thoughts. Whether you’re journaling, storytelling, blogging, or just jotting down fragments in a notebook — you’re creating space to be honest, to heal, and to reflect.

You don’t have to be a professional writer to benefit from writing. You just have to be willing to be real. Even if no one else reads it, writing gives you the chance to hear yourself. And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need most.

Start Where You Are

I’m not saying writing will fix everything. But I know firsthand that maybe it can help. you too It helped me find direction in college. It helped me confront the hardest parts of my life. And it helped me find my way back to myself.

So if you’re feeling overwhelmed, lost, or even just a little off — try writing. One of my favorite professors always said something to the class, something I will paraphrase here. Essentially, he would always tell us to “Start with a sentence. A memory. A moment. Don’t worry if it’s messy or emotional or awkward. Just write. Even if it’s just 10 minutes every day, just write.” And he was right. And writing like that just means it’s honest. That’s where the healing can begin.

I hope you enjoyed this piece and I wish you good luck. And I encourage you to start writing. You never what you may learn from it.

-Jay